What a busy week it’s been for boyband Blue. First they announce they’ve reformed to sing for the UK at Eurovision. Then days later Antony Costa demonstrates his love for the city streets by pissing on a cashpoint machine in central London. Let’s have a look, based on lyrical evidence, at where the boys might be marking their territory next.
Simon
Public piss location: A tower block stairwell.
The song: Bubblin’
Love the way you’re shakin’ it for me, can we take it upstairs from the lobby?
I don’t see nothing in you and me bubblin’
How do we get started, how do we get private?
Once we get inside, it’s gonna be troubling
You and me bubblin’
Simon says: I love the convenience of a stairwell, especially when in company. It really sorts out the men from the boys.
Lee
Public piss location: On the dancefloor
The song: Too Close
Step back you’re dancing kinda close
I feel a little poke coming through on you
Now girl I know you felt it
Before you know it, I can’t help it
Lee says: I love the privacy and excitement of a darkened dancefloor! Keep your handbags on the tables to be on the safe side, girls!
Duncan
Public piss location: Out of a car window
The song: Fly By
What a night, so far
Pullin’ up kerbside in your car
What a sight, you are…
UK style, UK flow – We got you hot like Whoa!
Duncan says: I’ve never felt so free or so male as when I’ve been pissing in the wind from a moving car.
Antony
Public piss location: A courtroom
The song: All Rise
You’re on the stand, with your back against the wall
Nowhere to run, and nobody you can call
Oh no, I just can’t wait!
Antony says: I’d like to apologise to the members of the court, to my mum, and to the people of the United Kingdom, whom I am proud to be representing at the forthcoming Eurovision Song Contest in Düsseldorf, Germany.
My Citrus Sarcophagus 